Fundamentally, that which you are ultimately seeking cannot be described in any way, or even be named in a meaningful way. Yet, as long as we communicate using language, we need words and names for everything that we want to refer to. So we give a name even to the un-namable – contradictory as that actually is. We may call it God, Inner Truth, or The Absolute.
The Absolute cannot be described. It is beyond all description. In a sense it is even beyond experiencing, since The Absolute is All-encompassing, whereas experiencing requires an experiencer, who is apart from the experienced, and who would then be apart from the All.
Even the statement that The Absolute is beyond experience is misleading. A more accurate wording would be; The Absolute is prior to experience, since The Absolute is direct, immediate, more intimate than any experience. It is your very nature. It is the essence of what you are.
It is the paradox of paradoxes, that what you are seeking is that which you are. But such is the human condition, that you have lost awareness of your true nature, and hence find yourself on this journey back to where you have never left from. The journey of awakening to the The Absolute.
Along this journey you come across many descriptions of The Absolute, none of which are true – for the reasons stated above. Each description has its usefulness however, as an inspirational pointer in the direction of The Absolute. A description is a perspective of understanding of The Absolute, whose usefulness on your journey toward awakening is determined only by how closely aligned it is with where you are at, on your journey, at that particular time.
A perspective is simply a viewpoint, an angle of approach. It is an abstraction, which has no reality in itself. Yet, by stepping into a suggested perspective, you may find that it offers you the inspiration and the awareness that you need, to continue onto the next step of your journey.
What is presented here, then, is a selection of inspirational perspectives. The questioner – who could be yourself – is offered a place to stand, a viewpoint, that inspires to awakening.
Some of these inspirational perspectives may appear to be paradoxical and contradicting one another, but that is simply because they have been offered as pointers to different people, being on different points in their journeys. Does Rome lie to the West or to the East? That depends on where you stand, when you ask for directions.
Hence, depending on where you are on your journey at the time of reading, each inspirational perspective has the potential to offer different degrees of usefulness and inspiration.
Nevertheless, ultimately, awakening is assured. And in awakening there is the realisation that the dream was merely a dream, and that even the journey toward awakening was part of that dream, since that which awakens was never lost in the dream and was never even asleep…
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A drop in the ocean
A drop in the ocean is definitely trapped in a problem of an illusionary identity. It is an amount of water believing itself to be a drop, a separate entity surrounded by an ocean, consisting of other drops.
From an elevated perspective there is of course no such thing as a drop in the ocean – it is all just the ocean, without any separating boundaries, all one and the same water. So, the drop’s whole existence as a drop relies entirely on this little amount of water continuing to perceive illusionary boundaries separating it from the surrounding ocean.
Letting go of the illusionary separateness means that the drop ceases to exist, but of course the water does not cease to exist. Instead, it returns to the awareness of being the ocean, something immensely larger than the drop ever was. Yet, since the little water truly believes that it is a drop, the water has an immense fear of letting go of its illusionary separateness. The water which makes up that drop – believing itself to be the drop – believes that it will cease to exist at that moment.
It is a happy moment indeed, and the whole ocean rejoices, when the little water discovers that it is something much more than a mere drop, when it returns to awareness of being the ocean.
And so it is with the human soul.
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To be, to exist as a conscious being – there is no greater miracle than this! It is an impossibility against infinite odds. And yet you are.
This is the mystery of mysteries, the Great Mystery that surpasses all understanding – that you are, that you exist. That you exist as a being of awareness, immersed in a perpetual stream of impressions flowing through the infinite ocean of consciousness, creating everything that you experience as your reality.
The Source of your beingness lies beyond your experiential reality, beyond the infinity of consciousness, in which all your experiences occur. It is unfathomable, unimaginable and indescribable. It is Absolute Reality.
Absolute Reality is what you truly are. It is your true self, the Self, which can only be known through being; aware being.
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If you really want to know the answer to the question “What is awareness, what is beingness?”, then you will have to find out for yourself. You don’t need to go and ask someone, and no one would be able to tell you anyway.
Awareness and beingness, which are actually inseparable, are/is available to you all the time.
Find out for yourself what it is. Find out, by direct, immediate contact with it, not indirectly, via concepts.
After all, what could possibly be more fascinating and intriguing than that question; what is awareness-beingness?
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Awareness – that you are
Be aware that you ARE, for that awareness is what you are.
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Being you IS: consciousness perceiving reality from the particular perspective that constitutes “you” – consciousness experiencing itself from that one point that consists of all the flows and influences inherent in consciousness as they manifest and interrelate in that particular point.
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All that you experience are reflections in that which you are, and as such are also part of what you are. It just does not appear like that to you, because you identify (mistakenly) with one part of what you experience only – the body-mind system – and so end up believing that you are an individual, separate from the other parts of what you experience.
To release this misidentification, you need to de-identify, i.e. re-identify with that which is not part of experience.
The ‘path’ to that goes via its primary phenomenon – being.
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You ARE, for the joy of being.
When you seek happiness elsewhere, in anything else than simply being, fears and desires will toss you around and make your life miserable.
When you seek your joy in being, all is well.
There is no need to seek the Absolute. You ARE the Absolute experiencing being. For the joy of being.
So enjoy. Enjoy being!
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False concepts of self
The idea, the concept, that you have of yourself is what creates you as who you think you are, the “you”.
Any concept you have of yourself creates a “you”. Even the concept “I am consciousness”, somehow creates a “you”. The personal, limited being, the idea of existing as “you”, comes from having some concept of yourself, a concept of what you are.
Even though “I am awareness, I am consciousness” may very well “be true”, it still applies a concept, an idea, to something which doesn’t exist until it is conceptualised or described in one way or the other.
Your sense of existing as “you” comes entirely from the description of yourself, the concepts that you have about yourself.
Only when there are no concepts about yourself is the truth present to itself.
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In orthodox psychoanalysis inkblots are sometimes used as a means to get insight into a person’s psyche. An inkblot is simply a random pattern of ink, “spilled” onto a piece of paper, and whatever you see in the inkblot – maybe it looks like a rabbit, or a butterfly, or, why not, a human being – is thus generated by your own psyche, and projected onto the inkblot, according to your own inherent tendencies and mind patterns.
The inkblot is a useful analogy for understanding the illusory nature of the world of space and time. Everything you see appears as whatever it appears like, due to the inherent tendencies and patterns in consciousness. Reality is simply a swirling ‘cloud’ of consciousness, a multi-sensory, multi-dimensional inkblot. In and of itself consciousness has neither space nor time, and has no forms, objects or entities in it.
Yet, onto this inkblot you (i.e. the viewpoint in consciousness that you are identified with) project space, time and whatever forms, objects and entities that you (the viewpoint) happen to generate, according to your (its) inherent tendencies and patterns.
The world you experience, including the person who you experience and identify yourself as, has no existence independent of this process of perception. You ARE all that you perceive. Yet nothing that you perceive really exists – it only appears to exist. All that really exists is consciousness. Consciousness being conscious of consciousness, and perceiving itself as various forms, objects and entities existing in the realm of space and time.
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Science and meditation
Science studies the objects of matter. Meditation studies the matter of the subject.
When you completely and totally ARE the subject, you transcend the subject-object dualism.
With objects of matter, when you delve deeper and deeper into a particle, you eventually reach the level where there is only a sea of swirling energy.
Similarly, with the matter of the subject, when you delve deeper and deeper into the “I” particle, you eventually reach the level where there is only a sea of swirling consciousness.
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The centre point
Meditation is an attempt to withdraw into your centre. Not the centre of your physical being, but rather the centre of your experience, which is the centre of you, the perceiver of the experience.
Anything that you experience is obviously not you – you are the subject, and what you experience is the object. You can compare it to a spinning wheel; where all of your experience is the wheel that is turning, and you are the very centre of the wheel, that point around which all the movement occurs, but which is not moving in itself.
This point, the centre of the wheel that doesn’t move, can’t actually be found anywhere, if you go looking for it, because every little “centre point” you look at can be magnified further, so that it in its turn has a centre and a circumference, where every part outside of the centre moves. So you have a new “centre point”, which again can be magnified, and so on forever.
Hence, the actual centre point is only a concept, a mathematically defined location which cannot be located in the physical reality. It is a mathematical point only, and as such does not have any extension. It is infinitely small, i.e. too small to be found in physical reality. It is a construct only, a concept.
Similarly, that which you refer to as “me”, the centre of all your experience, that point from which you look out at the experience, is also only a concept. It is a conclusion; that there must be this perceiver of the perceived, which you have come to call “me” or “I”. But it has no actual reality. It is not part of the field of experience, the field of perception. It is a concept only, which is nowhere to be found in what we call reality.
To this conceptual point, beingness has attributed itself. Beingness has attributed itself to this concept, which is what gives the concept a sense of reality, i.e. gives the “me” or “I” a sense of reality.
This sense of reality, that is “loaned” to the “I” concept, is what makes you protest when I tell you that you don’t exist – “of course I exist! what nonsense is that!?” But what has reality is not the “I”, the concept, but beingness alone – attributeless beingness, which has attributed itself to a concept, but which in itself is without attributes, without descriptions.
Beingness is not in the world of concepts, it simply IS. It is outside of, or inside of, or prior to, or beyond all concepts. Which is why it cannot be described in any way, since you need concepts to describe anything – even using terms like outside / inside / prior / beyond, or for that matter the term beingness itself, you are describing and giving attributes to beingness, and making it a concept. But we need words to communicate…
So in meditation, withdrawing into beingness, that which is real discovers itself to exist not in this world of concepts, but in its own reality – the only reality there is, since everything else is conceptual.
In other words, reality realises that it is actually reality, and not the concept which it had attributed itself to.
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The unfolding rose
The Rose Bud does not become a rose by trying hard to be a rose. It does not become a rose by being unhappy about being a bud. It becomes a rose because it lies within its nature to become a rose. There is nothing it needs to do really, for this to happen. Its petals will unfold in the pace that is assigned by its nature.
The bud’s responsibility is to be a bud. And what it will benefit most from doing, is to practise appreciating being a bud. When it learns to appreciate each step along the way to becoming the rose, it will also appreciate being the rose when its time comes.
If it does not practise appreciating being what it is, it will not know how to appreciate being the rose either – and it will compare itself with the other roses around it, and think of itself as less beautiful than the others…
And of course, if it does not approve of itself, and accept itself as a bud, it will not want to expose itself, and so may never open its petals and become a rose.
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The source of joy
True Joy is always present in the Greatest Mystery of all; that you ARE, that you at all exist and experience anything. In the awareness of this Mystery lies the source of Joy.
When you lose your sense of joy and appreciation of life, all you need to do is to begin to again contemplate this mystery of mysteries, and your joy springs forth yet again.
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You are that which experiences
Only because you ARE, do you get to experience all this – life.
Not because you are the person who you are – the person who you are is simply part of what you get to experience.
Not because you are a human being – being a human being is simply part of what you get to experience.
Not because you are this or that – being this or that is simply part of what you get to experience.
But because you are that which experiences, that to which and in which all this occurs – consciousness, awareness.
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If you are interested in deepening your spiritual awareness, you may want to consider participating in the Integrating Awareness Meditation course…